Friday, July 6, 2012


REMEDIAL ACTIVITY

I'm still here but I've been without access to the internet for six months so imagine my reaction when Tim hooked me up to the world when he visited last evening. The first thing I did was to go to the blog and I read the most recent entries and wept and wept......both at what our offspring wrote and all of your comments. It was quite overwhelming, to put it mildly.

I've forgotten how to blog. It's taken a fair amount of time today just to get this far. Being confined to bed since early February means I've also lost the ability to walk. One should have to learn that skill only once in a lifetime when it's not far to the ground. Arthritis is getting in the way this time as I struggle to make progress.

Surely it goes without saying that I miss Mr. Bob tremendously. So often it feels as though he's just in the other room and the realization that he's not is devastating. It feels as though I'm just now, three months after we lost him, beginning to really grieve. Too many people have been around me in Skilled Nursing and having a roommate, nice as she was, prevented me from venting my emotions.
You saw for yourselves how our children stepped up to the plate and in addition to doing what needed to be done, went way beyond the call of duty. I'm deeply touched by their expressions of devotion. On what would have been our 59th wedding anniversary, they sent me an arrangement of three roses, one representing each of them.  They are indeed special people.

Now the question arises about the wisdom of continuing this blog with the main character missing. Any ideas to help in my decision?
Whether we do or don't keep on with it, please know how important it was to have you walk the path with us as we weathered some very difficult times. It made all the difference in the world to have your support.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.



30 comments:

  1. I've been awaiting this posting, let me scroll to the top of your page, since May 1. At the kitchen table we mulled over your silence but refused the speculate on the reason for it. I am thrilled to read this. Of course, you must blog.

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  2. Oh, Jane, I can't tell you how excited and thrilled I was to open my email tonight and see your "Manorisms" post waiting. I have missed them dearly. I won't pretend to understand how devastating the past months have been for you, but having lost both parents and now caring for a spouse who is battling cancer, I have an inkling. Of course--selfishly--I would love the posts to continue. And, while Uncle Bob will not be physically present, he will always be a part of every post, just as he is always in our hearts.

    And--I agree--the messages posted by Tim and Susan were stark demonstrations of how deep the writing gene runs in your family. Beautiful, poignant, and oh, so real. XOXO

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  3. Oh, Jane--it's so good to hear how you're doing. I've thought of you so many times, and wondered how you are doing. I hope you have it in you to still blog some, but I would totally understand if you didn't--even if you put up a one liner or a photo here and there, it would be so good to know how you are.

    You look great! This was my first year for Mother's Day AND Father's day without my parents, so I thought of your kids without their dad...

    Your kids are the best--they love you guys so much, and it was really so heartbreaking to know what you all were going through over the last months. You've been, and will be in my thoughts...so good to hear from you, at any rate! Take good care, and know you are well-loved by many folks. Love to your family, too... xo Sue

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  4. You probably need a few good laughs. If you can find them in your current situation, it will lift you up. I think you should continue as long as you can/want to give yourself this little focus. And to please the friends and readers who were just waiting to hear from you.
    I think it will help you heal. Love, Jeanne

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  5. Just the other day, whirring down the freeway, I found myself thinking, "I miss Mr. Bob so much. The world is not the same without him."

    That was followed by missing your blog and being in awe of your observational skills, brilliantly crafted entries, and the connection that has been a lifeline to many.

    Miss you terribly, Dear Jane, and hope you will keep blogging. A day without Jane is like a day without sunshine...

    (See...we need YOU!)

    Lisa

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  6. Dear Jane -

    I'm so grateful to see you writing your blog again. I can only begin to imagine how difficult the grieving is and how much you miss dear Bob. But, the way I see it, he's not missing. He's present, but in a different way.

    One of the caretakers who helps Matt and Lee now (I'm in Oregon at the moment), lost her sister this week. I found a card that we're going to give her. This is what it says:

    "What if the brilliant, twinkling stars that bring the dark night sky to life are windows looking out of heaven? And at the very moment when we're wishing on those stars, hoping that the loved ones we have lost are happy, safe, and free... maybe they are looking at those same stars from the other side, making the same wish for us... sending us all their love. I'm wishing you the comfort of loving memories and the feeling that you'll always be connected to one so close to your heart." (Sharon Valleau)

    A nice thought.

    xoxo
    Melinda

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  7. Oh Jane, I/ve been thinking of you all this time and wondering how you are faring ! I could not, and cannot find words to express my emotions on learning of Mr Bob's passing.
    Please blog on ! And please learn to walk again - you can do it, I know you can !
    xx Suzan

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  8. Welcome back, we've been waiting for you.

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  9. I just laid my head down after a long day with work, fundraiser planning, adoption event & good friends! Only to find this email from Manorisms! I could not open it fast enough..

    I often wonder how you all are doing. Very excited to read your news. I was shocked at how my dads death put my life into uproar months after...so I can understand the time it's taking to get back in the game so to speak.

    I, along with the others, are more than happy to see you back.

    As for the main character being gone...no, he's not, tell us a story Jane.

    Love & ease to you Jane
    Ember

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    Replies
    1. YAHOO YAHOO YAHOO YAHOO YAHOO YAHOO YAHOO OOHAY OOHAY OOHAY OOHAY OOHAY OOHAY

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    2. The above is me,,,, Annon Y Mouse

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  10. Welcome home Jane
    The Dorsettlers

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  11. We think Mr Bob would have wanted Yaa to carry on,So get to it Jane!!!,
    Kindest regards,
    Sheila and Harvey.

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  12. Dear Jane, I have missed you so. Having you back and continuing your blog would be wonderful. I love you. Marlene

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  13. Dear Jane,
    It's truly a wonder and a delight to hear your voice again! You have been in my heart and in my mind during all these months and I've been wishing you the strength you need for every day. Your story is unfinished and I know that I am one among very, very many who long to hear what you have to tell.
    Much love,
    _Robin

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  14. Jane I'm so glad yu are back on line. I've missed your postings and the ability to send you my regards. Chris Nelson

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  15. I just talked with Timi and she told me about your post being on line today. My heart absolutely sang with joy at the thought that I might once again see your sweet face and hear your observations on life and smile at your view through the fotos you post. I realize that you must feel the void where Mr. Bob filled your life with his presence for so many years but you are blessed and fortunate to still have his love and all those treasured memories. If you can't share those personal feelings, please at least give us some of your day to day observations. You have enriched my life more than you can imagine!!! T.O. Joanne

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  16. I'm grateful that you wrote! My vote is for any blogging you feel up to doing. You know how much we all enjoy Manorisms and your voice. And it's a way to keep Bob's voice continuing. Your kids are awesome! And their parents too.

    Sending you the kind of hopeful determination that you had as a toddler! Much love, Jeannie

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  17. Dear Janie,
    What a thrill it was to see your email today! We have thought of you so often hoping that you would begin blogging. Reading your daily 'take' on life gave our spirits a lift! No one can describe the funny (or at times sad) events that take place better than you. Bob's presence will be felt with every word you write. We all loved him and he above all would want you to continue doing what you love most.

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  18. Jane, We were so glad to receive your blog. We have been wondering how you are doing. We imagine it is a very challenging time for you.
    We are certainly keeping you in our thoughts and prayers. One of my friends told me recently it took her about two years to begin feeling normal after losing her husband. You are such a creative writer and if you still want to do your blogs, it would be terrific. You always have interesting ideas. We miss you and Bob. Love, Gloria and George.

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  19. Jane,
    I am so happy to hear from you. Isn't your blog the best of ideas?

    Love,
    Erika

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  20. your voice is so welcome to all of us, Jane. Bless you for finding your way back. I selfishly hope you want to stay online "with" us. Your family's communications shepherded us through one of life's amazing transitions. While I am sure it was only a glimpse of your and their reality, we are grateful for it.

    blessings to you, denise f in c'ville, va

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  21. Mary Jane
    I see you sticking your head out of your foxhole. Come out and show yourself...please.
    So happy to 'see' you again.
    John in Illinois

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  22. Oh, Jane...It's so good to hear from you!! Please, please continue to blog. I so love to hear from you and read your beautiful musings and wisdoms. My thoughts are with you as you miss Mr. Bob. You must have such wonderful memories! Your children are truly devoted, loving offspring. But then, consider their parents!

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  23. Oh Madame
    We have you back. And we have Bonjour Bob forever. YOU have to keep working at it..huh? Do whatever you want - just make noise about it.
    Bon soir.

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  24. I must add another thought---not only is it WONDERFUL to hear from Jane---but, I have missed Jane's followers as well!

    It's good to hear from all! What a wonderful cyber clan we have become!

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  25. Wow!,,,Surprise, surprise and delight. I'd become so accustomed to looking and seeing nothing , I had become remiss. So happy to hear your voice again.

    Diane.

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  26. Oh, Jane!! ♥

    I am so happy to see you here again. I had no idea you were without internet for so long. I hope you could feel all the love and good wishes in real-time even if you read them belatedly.

    I love the gesture of the three roses. My two brothers and I did that for my grandmother after our grandfather died. You have such good kids, Jane. I hope they're all there for each other and doing as well as can be.

    Good luck with the physical therapy.

    I know you miss Bob. In our own way, we all do too.

    Much Love, ♥♥

    Val

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  27. I agree with what everyone else wrote! Welcome back!!!! You've been missed.
    XOXOXOXO,
    MJ

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