MEMORIAL MEMORIES

In sorting through the stacks of cards that have arrived over the past six months........get well cards, birthday cards, thinking-of-you cards and messages of condolence, there was a letter from Lisa (pictured above) that I thought summed up Mr. Bob's memorial service better than anything I could write and I'd like to share it with you here.

                         ††††††††††††††††††††††

Dear Jane,

Words are not easy to find.

I didn't want to write until after Bob's memorial. I was sure I would learn a great deal from the Humphrey approach to a major Life event......always with inspiration, imagination, creativity and heart. I knew I would be touched. I knew I would find many valuable lessons. I did not know it would transcend any memorial I've ever attended. It was absolutely perfect from the warm greetings, to the beautiful photographs, to the heartfelt words, to the cloud of pure love emanating from the room. Your family was absolutely beautiful, each and every one. They did their father and their grandfather and their mother proud.

Tim's solo, joined by the jazz band was one of the most beautiful sounds I've ever heard. It expressed what could never be said with words. And, to end with "When the Saints Go Marching In" and the proud parade of the jazz umbrella.......was to know, without doubt, that a saint went marching in.

I found myself celebrating how loudly Bob lived.....in a very quiet way. I learned so much in his presence. People who live out loud never seem to have the same powerful effect of men like Bob who have no need to brag and boast. Actions define them. I was enheartened by those observations. I watched a real man love his life, his family, his wife, and his friends while saying very few words.

One of my indelible memories will always be the example you both set as husband and wife. It is unparalleled and will always guide me.......perfect in any imperfections, sweeter than any relationship I have ever observed. I have watched you and Bob live it consistently. You were incredible teachers.

The other words that will linger was the compliment that will always define you and Bob........that you changed the Manor. Your presence, your energy, your creativity, your warmth, your service ....gave it new heart, new soul. How beautifully the words were shared and how much it compliments you and Bob. That is a legacy!  That is something to strive for.......and you accomplished that by the sincere act of being yourselves!


Again, I am enheartened.
                                                                All my love,
                                                                              Lisa

Tim spoke of the music that his dad had appreciated.

Tim had taken a few clarinet lessons ten years ago, soon giving it up.
His playing at the memorial came as a complete surprise.

The Golden Eagle Jazz Band marched in after Tim played the opening bars.

Mr. Bob would have loved the music, but he'd never in the world have believed his memorial would draw such a crowd.

My words were few. I said that I had indeed married well and that Mr. Bob would be sorely missed.

Owen and his cousin, Ethan, were models of decorum
during the memorial.

Jeanine had spoken earlier of Mr. Bob winning the
jazz umbrella. He made a gift of it to her and we
were surprised that she brought it to the event and
marched to "When the Saints Go Marching In".

The Manor kitchen prepared a feast of delectable food.

Mr. Bob loved mariachi music, and so did the guests.

Here is Susan and her beautiful daughter and two sons. It was a blessing we
could all be together.

Memorial: A farewell party for someone who already left.z

DIDN'T IT RAIN?

MOST YEARS the weather turns hot once school starts, but so far this fall, it's been relatively cool and today water is steadily coming down from the sky. Wet water. And on the day that I  got up at 5 to have my hair washed and blown dry ahead of taking Mr. Bob for his chemotherapy session.


Last night, in anticipation of this morning's rain, I asked him if he knew where the umbrella was. "Oh, yes," he sez, sez he. (Thornton Burgess was an author of children's books and I once read that he was paid by the word, therefore there's a lot of "he sez, sez he")


Except that this morning there was no umbrella to be found."Well, it's in the car," he sez. It's quite a walk to the parking lot, some day I'll count the steps. Giving him the bag of unforgettables, I told him I'd come around and pick him up in front. I think he had in mind coming to the car to find the umbrella, but it seemed of little use to me since by then I'd be thoroughly wet and our destination was in a covered parking structure. So I think I kind of barked the instructions as I repeated them. I splashed my way through the puddles, finally, out of breath, reaching my destination, heaved myself into the van and backed up..........but the remote control had no effect on the gate. Over and over I tried. What to do? Mr. Bob had my cell phone, no one was in sight, time was racing and I was going nowhere.


Finally I dared to honk a couple of times, hoping to be heard and Roberto, one of the maintenance crew came running toward me in his yellow slicker and did something magical that allowed me to exit. Mr. Bob doesn't tolerate tardiness, but this time we were fifteen minutes late and he knew it was best not to challenge me on the point.


He did what he had to do......it was just an hour's session this morning.....and as we prepared to head home, a search of the car turned up nothing in the way of an umbrella. I'm ashamed to admit that I drove home with tight lips and hair growing increasingly limp. This is a long-standing issue for us with umbrellas.


I let His Nibs off in front of the Manor where he was just a matter of a few steps from home and seethed my way around a couple of blocks before I decided to go in search of an umbrella. Remember I didn't have the ability to get in the gate......no doubt it was a battery issue. And Mr. Bob frowns at the idea of my parking on the street in front of the Manor. He bristled when someone once left a card, "We buy junk cars".


CVS was the closest place I could think of and since I didn't want one of those modern, collapsible, fancy-schmancy umbrellas, I had a choice between two bumbershoots that were left over from the rush to buy them that the first rainstorm always brings.


I don't think we'll overlook this giant, redder-than-red one with
G.L.E.N.D.A.L.E  emblazoned on the side. Of course there's really nowhere either to store it or let it drip dry, but it was a perfect out-picturing of what I was feeling at the time.

And to top it off, I parked on the street.


Really, he shouldn't have commented on how prematurely I step on the brake in wet weather. He's a better driver than I, but one without  a license, more's the pity. And besides that, he's not the only one with cancer.

BEWARE! MAD WOMAN AT LARGE!

"When angry, count four; 

when very angry, swear."  

                                                             ~Mark Twain

PARASOLS

I'M WONDERING........Did parasols come into frequent use on our streets about the same time that the Asian population swelled? It's such a good idea and a far cry from the days that we did everything possible to darken our skin.

If and when I ever decide to walk anywhere, I'm going to use a parasol.

"The American people never carry an umbrella. They prepare to walk in eternal sunshine." 
                                                       Alfred E. Smith 

YELLOW UMBRELLAS

Christo & Jeanne-Claude

The Umbrellas - Japan-USA, 1984-91

"Christo and Jeanne-Claude prepared for their next project, "The Umbrellas". The plan was to have yellow umbrellas set up in California and blue umbrellas in Japan at the same time. In December 1990, after much preparation, the first steel bases for the umbrellas were installed. At the bases 80 cm long anchors were fastened to the ground to withstand tensions of 1,500 kgf (15 kN). In September 1991 the umbrellas were brought to their places by 2,000 workers. In California, some of the bases were transported to the site by helicopter. The final cost of the project totaled $26 US million. By 7 September, 1,340 blue umbrellas in Ibaraki and 1,760 yellow umbrellas at the Tejon Ranch in southern California had been set up; the exhibition opened on 9 October 1991. In total, 3 million people saw the umbrellas, each measuring 6 meters in height and 8.66 meters in diameter. The umbrellas became a huge tourist attraction, finding use as everything from picnic spots to wedding altars. Two people died: A woman, Lori Mathews, was killed when one of the umbrellas hit her because of a wind gust, and a man, Masaaki Nakamura, was electrocuted while removing umbrellas when he came under a high voltage power line."^[

Today's entry is my way of introducing the locale about which I'll write tomorrow. I'm borrowing Google images, having long ago lost the pictures we took when we visited during the short time Christo and Jeanne-Claude's exhibit was in place before it was dismantled prematurely after a visitor lost her life.