IN THE NICK OF TIME

I'VE BEEN BESIDE MYSELF with the sadness of it all and on top of everything, I'd let myself get hurt feelings over some of Mr. Bob's thoughtlessly uttered words. Intellectually, I realized that anything could be excused under the circumstances, but the sobbing wouldn't stop, no matter how hard I tried and I had to dodge around the premises to avoid running into people because I'd be unable to make intelligible sounds of explanation.

Having heard from a mutual acquaintance that Mr. Bob would like to see me, I was on my way to his room in the Health Center, my face wet with tears, barely able to see where I was going when all of a sudden a figure appeared right in front of me, seemingly out of nowhere. It was a person who is rarely seen around the Manor these days.....he's out in the neighborhood, performing his duties as Director of Community Relations. Mr. Bob and I have been particularly fond of this gentle man; so much so, that months ago I asked if he'd consider conducting my memorial service when that time comes. And I've only suggested that to one person before.... a man who is no longer on this plane of existence. I don't make such a request to just anyone.

For the next 30 minutes, at least, this magnificent soul sat down with Mr. Bob and me and assured us that he'd be with us all the way wherever this current journey takes us and the most comforting part was that he didn't offer up any of the platitudes you'd expect of an ordained minister, but he gave voice to our feelings that it's a rotten, no-good, crummy situation we find ourselves in and we can expect to get madder 'n hell at the smallest things, and to cry and wail and carry on and to affirm our love and cling to each other as we ricochet through this experience, one for which nothing heretofore has prepared us.

A half hour from sitting down, my tears had morphed from anguish to gratitude and I'd found some of the "peace" promised in the mantra I'd been repeating to myself when I remembered, which I'm ashamed to say wasn't always. "Thou shalt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Thee."

He'll be back, he said and left us with his card, ordering me to call him any time and he'll come at a moment's notice. "Will you send us a bill?", I asked, because he's also a licensed therapist. His answer was, "Probably not". 

And then, with the nurse's blessing, we went to dinner with Tim and our former neighbors who meet once a month for Chinese food. 

We have much for which to be thankful and I now look up to Mr. Doug even more than I did in the past, months ago, when this picture was taken.

“Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love. The real miracle is the love that inspires them. In this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle.”

Marie Lloyd